Month: July 2025
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The smallest minion has entered his villain era. Fueled by string cheese, wild ambition, and the salty tears of sibling defeat, he has — against all warnings — skipped his nap. Now it’s everyone’s problem. The air thickens. The house groans beneath his unspent energy. One sock off. A granola bar fused to his back.…
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It began with promise. The sun stood high like a spotlight for chaos. The hose was coiled. The splash pads were filled. Jack donned his swim trunks with the swagger of an experienced commander. James arrived with big feelings, wielding two squirt toys and one dramatic plan. Peace lasted 14 seconds. Jack tried to fill…
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AITA for Clogging the Toilet with What Can Only Be Described as a Tube of Paint? By James, Age 3 (Preschool Picasso, Domestic Disruptor) — Hi. Hello. I’m James. I’m three. I have a dream and a digestive system, but only one of those is relevant here. Earlier today, I found a tube of bathtub…
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Scene: 3:12 PM. Target parking lot. Engine running. Coffee secured. I am alone. I have done the impossible. I peeled my goblin-covered body off the couch, tiptoed past Jack’s Nintendo fort and James’s interpretive dance protest, and whispered to my husband, “I’m just running to Target.” He blinked. Slowly. Like someone who just realized he was…
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If my tail has graced it, if my fur has coated it, or if my soul has napped upon it—it’s mine. Should a human dare claim the throne (i.e., the warm laundry pile), they shall be judged silently from across the room… and then shunned until snack tribute is presented. The humans may desire “cuddles”…
