Category: Life
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Before the council could begin, Sir James of the Living Room Kingdom climbed onto his designated leadership cushion with the solemnity of a man twice his age and half his snack supply. He surveyed his advisors — three loyal, questionably qualified, deeply beloved members of the Tequila Order — and nodded as if to say,…
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Today began like any other day: me, minding my business, trying to nap in peace while the small humans generated their usual level of chaos — somewhere between “mild earthquake” and “unregulated circus.” But then… the Incident occurred. I watched from my perch (the arm of the couch, my throne) as Jack, the tall one…
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Last night I asked my mom a thing that made her eyebrows freeze: “Do you think God gets hungry, Mom? Does He like grilled cheese?” I pictured Him up in the clouds, just sitting on His knees, and maybe angels bring Him snacks whenever He says please. Then I asked, “Who made God first? Did…
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This morning, I awoke to a shocking discovery: the entire world had been replaced with a giant bowl of cold, white nonsense. A full foot of it. Everywhere. The yard, the driveway, the trees — all buried under what I can only assume is sky‑trash. Naturally, I positioned myself at my observation post: the window…
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We pulled off the highway thinking it was just another pit stop—food, potty, back in the car—but Buc-ee’s had other plans. The doors opened and suddenly we were swallowed into a fluorescent kingdom of Beaver Nuggets, jerky walls, and bathrooms so vast they deserved their own zip code. And right in the middle of it…
