Posted by u/ChunkMasterFlex (3 years old)

So I (3M) have recently realized that names are just suggestions and I, being a visionary, am here to fix them.

My mom, known in this house as “Mom” or “Ashley” or “The One Who Says ‘No,’” was wearing a shirt with hot dogs on it yesterday. Naturally, I called her “Hot Dog Lady” for the rest of the day. She didn’t seem thrilled, but she did laugh-snort, which in my experience means approval.

Then there’s the dog.

Her original name is Tequila. I don’t know what that means. Sounds like a sneeze. I tried it. Didn’t like it. So I renamed her “Puppy Dog,” which is simple, elegant, and describes her perfectly. She is a dog. She is a puppy. You’re welcome.

Mom says that’s “not her name” and that “Tequila has history,” which is weird because she’s not even that old and I’ve never seen her at a museum.

Dad sides with me because I yelled “Puppy Dog, COME!” and she came. Case closed.

Now Hot Dog Lady says I’m “disrespecting names,” which is rich coming from someone who calls me “Bubby,” “Stinker,” “Love Bug,” and “Sir Screams-A-Lot” depending on her mood.

AITA?

Top Comment:
u/PookieTheJudge:
Names are tools. Titles are earned. You, sir, are correct. Tequila is a silly human indulgence. Puppy Dog is practical. As for your mom, she shall wear the hot dog crown until she launders that shirt. 🐾